Sunday , November 19 2017
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What’s appropriate first-date attire?

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After a few good phone conversations, we agreed to meet for afternoon coffee. It was a beautiful perfect-weather day, so I decided to wear a cute summer outfit.  I spent an hour taking a shower, dressing and getting my cute on.

Arriving early, I staked out an outdoor table at the coffee shop. He called to say he just drove by and was parking. That was thoughtful.

So imagine was surprise when he walked up in work-out shorts, t-shirt and sneakers. He obviously didn’t spend a nano-second thinking about first impressions. He knew I was a successful businesswoman. Did he think he would be appealing in this get-up? Or did he think one shouldn’t care how others decide to dress?

While one could argue that it’s shallow to care what others wear, it does set a tone. If one looks like they take pride in their appearance and desires to put their best foot forward, people notice. If one spends a little time deciding how to best show that they put some care into their presentation, it contributes to a positive first impression.

He was smart, articulate, nice and pleasant looking. He asked me questions about myself, but some were the same questions he asked yesterday on the phone. However, it was clear we had different world views, and he admitted he was broke.

So the quandary — since there was nothing odious, do I see him again? Or do I not waste each others time because it’s clear that there’s no long-term potential?

How have you handled such quandaries? See the person again or not?


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About Yury Zvyagolskiy

Yury Zvyagolskiy
In almost all American movies there is a bad guy who is usually Russian and his name is Yury. If the bad guy is not from Russia, his last name usually starts with Z. So here I am - Yury Z. My specialty is personal effectiveness. I am an expert in goal achievement, personal effectiveness, relationships and effective thinking.

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