She shares an adorable throwback photo and her thoughts on new motherhood
When it comes to opening up about the realities of being a new mom, Tess Holliday doesn’t hold back. The model and mom to ten-year-old Rylee and nine-month-old Bowie has shared her struggles with body image after giving birth and how some days, you get frustrated and cry over the pressures of parenthood.
This time she’s reminding us that although there are moments when we feel like we just can’t even as parents, there’s hope that one day we’ll look back on those tough times with happiness instead of frustration.
Holliday shared a sweet photo of herself breastfeeding Bowie this past September as a Tuesday throwback. To the outside eye the image captures a perfect moment — she’s rocking some amazing ribbon infused braids, the lighting is great, the house looks clean and calm. Her dog is adorable too, looking on to make sure the baby’s okay while he nurses.
But sometimes the image you project is at total odds with how you feel in the moment. Holliday says for her, this blissful breastfeeding picture was anything but. “This photo was taken at my dear friends @honeywoodvintage@charlieoverbey home during a dark time in my life,” she writes. “I was an emotional mess + struggling to find my way as a new mom again.”
I too was a mess during the first few months of my twins’ lives. I had finally achieved my dream of becoming a parent, but I spent many of those early days unsure of what I was doing, completely terrified of losing my sense of self to motherhood and crying all of the tears. Most days I stayed parked on the couch in my pajamas with the babies from sun up to sun down. I don’t know if I had PPD as I never sought treatment, but I know that I wasn’t happy at that time in my life.
Even though it might not feel like it in that moment, it’s possible that you’ll look back and see the darkest days of motherhood differently. I thought life as I knew it was over when my kids were newborns, but now I look back and see the sweeter side of those early days. It’s the same with Holliday.
This photo that used to bring her such sadness now brings fond memories of her baby boy’s first months. “When I looked at this photo a wave of sadness poured over me, but now I only see my tiny bubs nursing & Sweetie looking on like a nervous new mom,” she writes.
Parenting is hard AF. Holliday helps remind us the frustrations moms feel in the moment won’t necessarily last forever. “Life is messy, love is complicated, & it can all feel so overwhelming but we grow & learn. I’m so grateful for my life & appreciate it all, even if I can’t always see the light at the end… it’s there. Promise.”