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“Keep in touch”

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When one ends a first date, sometimes it’s awkward. You’re not sure if he enjoyed himself as much as you did. You’re waiting for a clue he did. Sometimes it’s in what he says as you’re saying goodbye.

“I’d love to see you again,” is a sure sign.

“I had a great time and would love to take you to dinner.” Even better.

“I’ll call you.” Not so much, as few do.

“Take care.” Not likely you’ll ever hear from him again.

So imagine my consternation when at the end of what I thought was a fun 45-minute drink date, the guy said, “Keep in touch” as we were parting. It might have been an unconscious uttering, not really knowing what to say. But I didn’t like that it was non-committal and it put the onus on me to initiate future contact.

I tried not to read more into it than the nebulous statement it was. I did not spend time with gal pals trying to decipher the cryptic comment. I just went on my merry way living my life and feeling that if he didn’t see what he’d be missing, it’s his loss.

While off-hand mutterings can telegraph what a person is really thinking, they can also be just verbalizations of someone not sure what they want to say. Women can get tied into emotional knots trying to figure out what unclear comments really meant, when they really mean nothing.

So while I believe in paying attention to what someone says, even in asides, as it will sometimes be very revealing, I also don’t recommend spending more than a nanosecond trying to decrypt unclear comments. If you are curious, ask for clarification.

Meanwhile, “Take care” evidently meant that he enjoyed himself as the next day he texted “It was a pleasure meeting you finally. Let’s plan on getting together sometime.” But this is also nebulous. Sigh. I like men who are clear!

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About Yury Zvyagolskiy

Yury Zvyagolskiy
In almost all American movies there is a bad guy who is usually Russian and his name is Yury. If the bad guy is not from Russia, his last name usually starts with Z. So here I am - Yury Z. My specialty is personal effectiveness. I am an expert in goal achievement, personal effectiveness, relationships and effective thinking.

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